With only two more sessions to go before we broke for the MYCTs, our group was really eager to do something more in depth this week. However, things didn’t turn out quite as well. Honestly, I think all of us are getting a little annoyed by how difficult it is to build a relationship of any kind with the patients. Or perhaps it’s just me. Either way, I’m getting quite frustrated that we don’t seem to be getting anywhere for our biography thing. I honestly feel that it just adds more stress into our schedules and that most of us really don’t find it necessary. After all, we all agreed that a short life story would be nice, but not necessary. Especially since we’re attending the guided autobiography class, I somehow feel pressured to actually make a biography for the patients, which I can’t seem to bring myself to do. I find it increasingly difficult to satisfy my own objectives every time we go to HCA, and it doesn’t help that the rest of the group feels quite demoralized (aka ‘xian’) about the project.
Today was quite boring. Some students from (Woodlands Secondary?) came by today to interact with the patients today, and they honestly did a good job at it. Better than two weeks before. The students were very enthusiastic and although it was quite obvious that not a few felt uncomfortable performing, especially with us there, but they nonetheless gave their utmost in carrying out their planned program. Again, we had little to do, mostly just talk with the patients. For me, I really couldn’t latch onto any conversation of any kind, and I keep feeling more and more upset each time. Really, it’s difficult for me to keep my motivation when there doesn’t seem to be a tangible objective in this project. I ended up spending more time talking to my project mates and helping out with moving the patients to their tea area, and bringing food to them, before clearing the used plates and cups. It was the exact same thing 2 weeks before.
I wanted to discuss a few things with Valiant before we left, but we decided to talk to him after the patients had left. He was occupied somewhere by then, and we left without getting to talk to him regarding that. I simply needed to check a few things regarding the e-travel program and our June holiday schedule. Especially the e-travel thing; I managed to find some good documentaries at home about Europe and the like; travel videos, to be precise. I just needed to check if Valiant approved of us showing them to the patients. Also, we needed to plan our June holiday visits; e.g. were we going to go on Tuesdays too? I was quite disappointed that we did not get the chance to discuss these things. The later we discuss it, the less time we have to prepare. Hopefully, we’ll get it settled next week.
I did finally decide upon a patient to do the biography thing on, which is a good thing, since I have been having problems with that for quite a while. He’s one of the more talkative patients there, and he’s bilingual as well, which makes my life a lot easier. I discovered that he could speak English quite by chance; while chatting to him, someone called him, and he responded in English. I guess both of us didn’t notice our language switch until a while later. Anyway, I was chatting to him quite nicely about what the students had played with them. Apparently, they used the question ball again, and he did express a lot of boredom. I suppose it’s good that I got this info; it’s a good reminder that the HCA patients are just as lively as anyone else, the difference lying only in their average life expectancy. I can now work on the e-travel thing with this in mind.
Honestly, I find that I have less and less to write about each time I do reflections. I suppose it’s because there’s nothing really new in what we are doing. For all the weeks we went, we have interacted with the patients in the exact same way every time. We arrive, we feel awkward with the other students around, we talk to the patients, we leave. I’m really looking forward to the e-travel program to brighten things up for once. Till then, I’ll just keep trying to strike up a good conversation.
Andrew Yap
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